Today's blog is about missing people/things. There's so many different types varying from; seeing your best friend everyday to suddenly not so you miss them because you've got used to it. Missing someone thats away for a while, it's a sudden change and let's face it nobody really likes change. Missing someone who you speak to everyday but don't see - long distance friendships/relationships. Missing someone that's died , missing your old school or if your someone that's ill or had an accident; your old life. Every single different missing brings out a different emotion, you can be angry for someone for leaving you or dying even when its not there felt its an emotion that crops up. Or you blame yourself, wishing there was something you could of done. When does it go from thinking about someone every single day to just the odd day when you hear a song or see something that reminds you of them, even a smell can bring someone to mind! I know that i still miss people every day! You can miss someone so much it actually hurts! ;P Sounds weird but yes you have so many different emotions and every one of them is because you care and love the person/ thing! 
I've felt all the different sorts of missing someone and i don't think any sort is nice because in some cases its like a part of you isn't all there , you just feel incomplete. It makes you so sad but surprisingly sometimes hope and courage comes from that! And why, well if someone has passed away you hope that there still around watching over you. I not sure what i believe in but all i know is that i really hope that there's something afterwards and you are reunited with your loved ones somehow some way. Hope maybe can come from when someone has suddenly gone away and you want to see them again, hearing from them, anything that tells you that there is hope there and you will see them again. When you put a belief into something or someone and you love them, then you will find even when life tells you its all over you still have that little bit of hope left at the bottom of the barrel when you thought you'd scraped it.
I miss my old life but i don't want it to be how it was, i miss what i'm stopped into becoming. I always imagined and almost planned how i thought everything would be, it just goes to show you cant really plan for life because its like rolling a dice you never really know what you're gonna get. I think i will always plan subcontiously because that's just who i am but maybe i should live more for the moment so disappointment doesn't strike. Although ironically wheres there's disapointment there's hope. Hope is what makes you never give up on a dream, a person or a principle. When you want something you can miss it although you never actually had it! It's like missing a dream! Sometimes it's that hope and want from missing that forces you to make a change and not to give up. So maybe its a good thing in some ways but not in others. In life we don't have the choices, we don't have the answers, we don't want things to change but they will we don't want some people to leave but they do. We have to adjust, keep going and cherish the time you do have with people or lifestyles because you never know when it's gonna change. 
Me missing my past and my future makes me not give up but i still hope one day i will get better and become a child psychologist or primary school teacher, go to Disney world and do all the things i feel i've missed out on whether it be something as silly as jumping in a puddle to a day at university! Me missing my friend who i talk to everyday but don't see makes me do a concious effort to see them and make every visit special. Me missing a friend thats away suckssssssssss but i will never give up on them or the hope of seeing them again. Me missing loved ones that have died makes me hold onto the memories and hope that although its the end, them being in my life isn't over because they made a difference to who i am and what i turn into. And that in another place another time another world! i will see them again. 
Photo of the week:
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| My amazing and talented friend Sarwahh drew this of me and i think it's so fantastic!!! Definite deserver of photo of the week!! :D Love Becca xox |
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